27. maj 2012 § Skriv en kommentar
echoes in so much space / void-filling early hours / it is a nothing / haunting me / after i met you / after i didn’t meet you again / perfect (stark staring mad loony) days / thinking / if only something very Frightening would / bomb bite capture mock pierce ravage wreck / those pictures and those / ( ) ( ) ( ) ( ) / of what you / said stroke drank touched stole saw silenced
2. maj 2012 § 1 kommentar
I was thinking about the things we keep, because we lost something else. We do loose. We loose moments, days, people, money, scores, skin, love, all the time, we loose ‘all this time’ all the time (and memory gains it all). We loose, and we try to keep. Sometimes, we try to throw out something, deliberately loosing something, yet still not knowing how to replace it by something else. Or someone else.
“Stop talking about this old shit. Then throw it out. Then consider the space. Then…” Then what?!?
This is the task in our mind, this is the impossible: forget what you gain, forget the dual thought of LOOSE-GAIN (give it freely to Memory!). This is the impossible; intentionally giving away what we had without thinking of its shadow or its replacement. There is no way to deliberately leave dualism and its ‘free choice’ between this or that (choix libre). There is no way to deliberately think outside the LOOSE-GAIN dualism – keep dreaming, Baby!
Such troubled minds, all over the place…and yet, at least we know about ways to be entertained, deliberately turning ourselves into states of Relaxation. This is possible and do-able; choosing Entertainment to enter Relaxation. This is the key-word, the word buzzing in our minds, the most shadowy word of the time; relaxation. Relaxation makes legal this ongoing Try of leaving the troubled dual-mind (the double-thought).
Television, alcohol, computergames, sex (still need to watch ‘Shame’, anyone?), interior decoration, facebook – entertainment getting us closer to the key-word; relaxation.
Let’s turn to Craft. Craft is not entertainment. Craft (knitting, carving woodwork, even motorcycle maintenance) creates states of Self-Oblivion, states of forgetting oneself, states of falling into something other than our-selves. This is not entertainment. This is Creature as Body.
But, even craft itself has become part of the self-reflective mind – right here, for instance, by me announcing it and its disappearing, right? Identity has occupied experiences of flow or self-oblivion, experiences of qualité, content. Identity is this; seeing myself through your eyes and it is also the telling of this seeing. Identity is the way we wrap something, a present for instance. The wrapping is now very much part of what is in the box, the wrapping and the present has grown into a pair. And moreover, where there is Pair (duals, binaries), there is also Value (hierarchy) and therefore a starting point, a place of the (most) Wanted. The wrapping is the most wanted – and it sometimes drives us mad by disconnecting us from content, from falling into content!
The wrapping is saying; “this I did for you, this I present to you, this I give to you, this is Me and that is You, this is Relation, intentionally.” And so, this is what we see and feel and say, this is what we are, this is Creature as Human (this is ‘Human, all too human’, thanx Nietzsche!). This is the great Exchange, this is Economy.
Our time is the time of the Present – and the wrapping is creating this present, the telling creating the human, the (re)presenting creating the self. I sometimes long for the time of the Gift. Turning to Derrida, we can discern between the present and the gift and we can create this question; “how to live ‘the Socially Real’ independantly of Exchange?” As well, this is impossible, this is a crazy question; how to give without knowing, without intention, without the telling nor the response? I’m pointing at some strange unthinkable life in the light of this unconditional gift beyond Mind, Memory and Self… What does social life look like when experience is created beyond the self-reflective mind? It is about force, and force is the impossible; paving the way for Gifting.
How to love in the time of the Gift? What kind of love happens outside the spheres of the self-reflective mind? Nietzsche writes about “self-mastery and the discipline of the heart”.
The discipline of the heart?? To be continued…